Running :)

"Running. You should, of course, wear a specially designed $200 Running Garment made from a synthetic material that has a name like the leader of a hostile reptilian alien invasion force in a space movie, such as "Gore-Tex". The beauty of these materials is that they actually "breathe". Really. At night, if you listen carefully to your closet, you'll hear your garment in there, breathing and occasionally chuckling softly at some synthetic joke it heard from your dress slacks."

Chapter: Running. 'Stay Fit & Healthy Until You're Dead', Dave Barry