You are thirst, and thirst is all I know

To the DesertBenjamin Alire Sáenz

I came to you one rainless August night.
You taught me how to live without the rain.
You are thirst and thirst is all I know.
You are sand, wind, sun, and burning sky,
The hottest blue. You blow a breeze and brand
Your breath into my mouth. You reach—then bend
Your force, to break, blow, burn, and make me new.
You wrap your name tight around my ribs
And keep me warm. I was born for you.
Above, below, by you, by you surrounded.
I wake to you at dawn. Never break your
Knot. Reach, rise, blow, Sálvame, mi dios,
Trágame, mi tierra. Salva, traga, Break me,
I am bread. I will be the water for your thirst.

(1979)

Rage

"How many losses can you take before you break?"

"And there is no use in pretending that there are days when your heart
Can hold nothing but your grief. Take a breath. Cry for all you're worth.
But don't forget, everyone else is crying, too. There is plenty
Of misery to go around. Don't let the smiles fool you. We're all living
In exile - it's just that some of us don't know it. You think the guy
On the freeway who's tailgating you and flipping you off isn't
In some serious pain? He wants you off the road, which is
Another way of saying he'd like to exile you from the fucking freeway
Of life. Forgive him. He's only doing what he's been trained to do.
He doesn't know where to put his pain and has mistaken it for rage."

From 'The Book of What Remains',  Benjamin Alire Saenz

No one will come

"..but it's two o'clock in the morning and no one will come.

You are left there in your own private archipelago of terror.

And you understand
That you are not only a stranger to yourself but a stranger
To the world you inhabit, a visitor, a foreigner, an illegal.

Who let you in? Who the hell let you in?"

Page 83, 'How in the Night (and the Meaning of Your Life)'
From 'The Book of What Remains',  Benjamin Alire Saenz

Uninhabitable

You are what you remember.

*           *           *           *           *
You must go out into the desert again.
You must live there in silence
until you encounter God.

*           *           *           *           *
Sometimes, you wake in the night.
You are afraid. You are afraid
that your heart will become
a desert again. Uninhabitable.

‘The Book of What Remains’, Benjamin Alire Saenz

Scars

"I am thinking of George Willard, how he left
Winesburg, Ohio. I am wondering how many
Scars he took with him and wonder if Salinger
Wasn't right, after all, when one of the heroes
In one of his books said that he had scars
On his hands from touching the people
He loved."

Page 23, 'Knowledge: The Hand of Another'
'The Book of What Remains' by Benjamin Alire Saenz

From Albors, a new piece:  http://soundcloud.com/dreimalbla/persuit-of-happiness